Halloween 2011

I work in a K-3 classroom with a little Autistic boy with another TA, and a CEA, as well as the teacher. It is such a great great classroom, the ladies are wonderful and the kids are amazing. Well this Halloween we decided to dress up as crayons, as you can see above.. lol! The day was a super successful day, our boys wore their costumes all day ( which is a first ) and had an amazing day with all the comotion they stayed calm and focused. I am so happy with how the day went, and so proud. What a great Halloween! Hope everyone has a fun and safe Halloween!

TTC update

Well I guess I shouldn't forget about this topic.I went to see an OB that I was referred to by my GP. This dr. was very gentle and quite nice. He understood my situation, showed lots of compassion for what I have been through but said there really is nothing he can do for me at the time. He wants me to loose 43 lbs so that my BMI is at a safer #. He told me that when I do that that he will then be able to give me fertility meds and be able to help me get pregnant. I was not very happy to hear that there was nothing he could do for me, but this appointment seemed all to familiar.... Another doctor telling me to loose the weight and get to the exact same #...... hmmmmmm there must be something to this. So I went home and thought about it for a little while and decided that I needed to not have so much pride and just get it done so that the dr's could help me achieve what seems to be the impossible! So I went home and started back on Jenny Craig.... Well I now only have 24lbs to loose and am very excited that the end seems to be in sight! Its not an easy thing to do but my desire for a baby is much stronger than any morsel of tempting food ever will be! Most of the time anyway!!

The everything post!

So lets see what happened after the Diaper cake?? Well our cat had kittens, she had 5..... 3 Torbies, 1 Orange and a Calico. We ended up keeping the Calico who I gave the name Pheonix, and a Torbie who we named Meeko. We were able to give the rest away to good homes. Meeko Pheonix We also had some great storms over the summer! Then there were a couple of weddings that we attended also. One in Canmore, another in Edmonton, and last of the summer weddings one in mission. Here is a sibling picture from one of those weddings. I think that about does it for major events other than our birthdays and 2nd Anniversary.

Diaper Cake

I know that I said that I would show you pics of the completed diaper cake. So here you go the much awaited pictures are here!

I am still here!

I realize its been 5 months since I last posted and I apologize for the neglect. I did change up my blog a bit so I hope you all enjoy the new look. I will be attempting to update you all on my life in the last 5 months by posting a few update blogs and pics. Thanks for your continued support and for all of you that have missed my posts keep your eyes peeled for more.

We said goodbye a Year Ago....

As today comes to an end I reflect on what the day brought.....

Alot of sadness....

Today marks the one year anniversary of loosing our baby. The emotions came flooding back and I spent most of the day in tears. I miss Peanut, the baby my Husband and I made together. Such sadness was had a year ago, and now much sadness was experienced today as well.

The nice things of today....

My wonderful Husband lit our memorial candle for peanut... and left it burning (safely) for me to see when I woke up this morning!! So VERY sweet... I am happy that he remembered our beautiful baby today!

A friend called to see how I was doing... Very unexpected but so very needed!

I am off to bed to wake up to a much better day tomorrow!!

Mommy and Daddy love you so very much peanut, my perfect Baby in Heaven!

A,B,C's of Fertility

I've seen this on a few of the blogs I follow so I figured I'd do it too!

A - Age at Which you Started TTC: 27

B - Baby Dancing or Sex: Sex

C - Children Wanted: Still want 3-4, just depends on my body

D - Dogs/Cats/Fill In Babies: We have an amazing dog (Min Pin / Jack Russel) DEXTEHR and 2 farm Cats Chleo & Zoe.... and soon some kittens

E - Essential Oils/Vitamins: I take a prenatal vitamin

F - Fertility Meds I've Taken: None really... I am only on Metformin

G - Gain, What I have Gained from Infertility: Other than 25 pounds.....

H - HSG: Nope

I - Infertile Pet Peeve: When I have friends who are on their second baby and I havent even had my first yet... or even pregnant!

J - Job Title: Behavioural Interventionist ( Working with children with Autism )

K - Kids Names you are Afraid will be Taken: If i tell you then you may take them... lol!

L - Lengh of Time TTC - Almost 21 months

M - Miscarriages: ONE, and we miss you lots Peanut!

N - Number of Times you have Swiched REs: None, We have never seen an RE. We are currently seeing a dr. at a fertility clinic. No RE's in our area.

O - Overian Quality: Good as far as I know

P - POAS or Wait for AF: POAS.. I'm addicted!! lol

Q - Quote from an Obnoxious Fertile: " Relax and it'll happen "

S - Sperm: Olympic Athletes... lol

T - Time you Tried Naturally: Going on 21 months

U - Uterus Quality: Good

V - Vagina: Yup i have one of those...

W - What Baby Stuff do you Already Have: An outfit I bought when i first found out I was pregnant and a couple of little things that sit in a rubbermaid tagged "baby stuff"

X - Xtra, Xtra, Hear all about it! How many people know about your TTC Journey: Everyone! After the loss I needed all the support I could get.

Y - Yearly Exam: I am almost 29 and have not had one until just recently...

Z - Zits: Lots of them...... Go Away!!

Another one!

So I am at it again and am making another diaper cake for a Baby shower on Sunday. I am really excited to be doing another cake and have lots of inspiration from "google" pics. I'll post pictures when it has been constructed but you will have to wait until after Sunday... till then I will leave you with a picture of the materials!

Go Vancouver!!

Wow What A Game!!!! That was some awesome hockey played tonight!! We are now moving onto the second round of the Stanley Cup Playoffs!! So excited!! This is our year Vancouver!! Go Boys Go!!

When they scored I was (obviously) excited, I let out lots of loud cheering (screaming).... Well my dog thought he should join in to and started to whine really loudly which turned into HOWLING..... Dex thought the Canucks played a pretty awesome game too I guess!!

Here's a pic of the Canucks biggest (doggy) fan!

A year later............

1 year ago today was one of the best days of my life. April 2, 2010 was the day Mark and I found out we were going to be parents. Oh how I miss you Peanut! Here's a picture of myself a year ago, and the very little stick that changed my life.





I never imagined that in one year my life could go from total bliss to complete sorrow, frustration, loss of hope, and fear....

Will I ever get to see those 2 beautiful pink lines again? Will I ever know what its like to feel life inside of me? Will anyone call me mommy? These are the things I think of as I sit here tonite.

I am going to another fertility appointment on Wednesday and hopefully that DR can give us a plan to move forward with.

I ask you this...... Just because I have extra weight does that mean I don't deserve to be a mom?

I know I am a day early on my post but I seem to have time tonight... and sure hope (for my sake) I dont have any spare time tomorrow!