Do you see a reaccuring theme?

Its been so busy in my household at the moment ( and not always good stuff ) that I have not had a chance to blog. So here is an update...

I have started a new job, working with Children that have Autism. So far it is really great but so very overwhelming to me at the moment as I am just starting this week. I want through training (which used to be done in 2 weeks is now done in 2 days) which caused serious brain overload!! When I went and watched my first session I felt somewhat better about the techniques, but overwhelmed about all the data to record and how I was going to know all the different programs I have to administer... I start doing my very first session alone on Thursday already.... oh my!

We are also purchasing a house and 10 acres just outside of Vernon ( where we currently live ) and there have also been a few set backs that have come up. It is a pure WAITING game with all of this, and better work out since we have a signed lease agreement with Tenants ( to rent our current home ) for November 1st and will be homeless otherwise.

I also had a dr's appointment last week to discuss 7dpo blood work. I had mentioned to her before that my Lp was a bit on the shorter side and was worried that my progesterone was low. She never was concerned about it before and told me pretty much that I was worrying to much over everything "pregnancy" related. I keep getting told by her to JUST RELAX!! anyway back to the results.. lol. So it turns out that some of my levels INCLUDING progesterone is LOW! We have also hit the 14 month mark since the beginning of TTC ( trying to conceive ) so she has given us a referral to a fertility clinic in Kelowna. I am very excited to go for my first appointment with them, even though they have not called me back yet to schedule one.... Again WAITING!

Sorry for not blogging I will try to be better.... you'll just have to WAIT and see if that works out.... lol! Thought I'd share in my WAITING!

Life can get better anytime now.......

This year is more than welcome to be over soon, It has been a rough year for my husband and I.

Lets start off with some positive though....

Mark and I just got back from 2ish weeks of vaction (which was very much needed) on Sunday. it was great started off with a couple of days in the shuswap, then off to Vancouver for the PNE and the Aquarium. After that we drove back to the Cabin for another night and then off to Kimberley and Cranbrook for 5 days. It was wonderful, we stayed in a B&B ( the first time ) and had wonderful food every morning. We did several activities while there including 4x4ing up Baker mountain in Cranbrook in a Tracker. So much fun!

We were having a great time, even a scenic drive home on Sunday.... Until.....
We got back into Cell range at 8pm, when we received a text from Marks cousin that his Opa had passed away earlier that day. If that wasn't bad enough I get a call at 830 this morning to find out that my uncle was in a Motorcycle accident and is in critical condition.

When life gets crappy it really gets crappy!

Void to be filled

I am not sure why this birthday is bothering me so much..... but it is!

I am going to be 28 tomorrow and what have I accomplished??

I own a House, Dog, 2 Cars, and have a Husband.

No Career and most important NO CHILDREN!!

I feel so incomplete with knowing that there is no one out there that needs protecting, and runs to me when scared. No One to snuggle to sleep, or to push on the swings. There's no one with my Eyes and Marks nose, No one to greet you at the door when returning from work. No One to call out I love you Mommy, You are the best Daddy!

I keep getting older and still want 3-4 children when is my body going to understand that I have an expiration date, and it needs to get its butt in gear!

When will this void be filled???

Annoyed!

I need to vent!!!

Here's the situation my Husband and I live in a Townhouse complex and share a common area with 4 other homes. We have a single car garage and room to park a car in front of our door and in front of our garage (Which is private property and paid for by the home owners (us)) So since we have lived here almost a year now there has been several times where we have come home to our neighbours company parked infront of our garage!!

IT HAS HAPPENED YET AGAIN!!! I am so fedup with this......... Anyway Mark went to the neighbor to ask him to move the vehicle and he was very rude about it.

I hate communal living!

Okie I feel a little bit better now.....

Success!

So I am done baking my Cinnamon Buns......

They are wonderful.... Lots of work but worth every bite, lol!

Here is the link to the recipe

http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Cinnamon-Rolls-II-2/Detail.aspx

Before going in the oven


After Being Iced


Final product

baking experiment

I went to the farmers market this morning for the first time with a friend and her kids. It was alot of fun!! Thanks Caroline!

So I am going to attempt to make Cinnamon buns this afternoon. I have never made anything with yeast in it before so this should prove interesting... I am excited to see how they turn out, actually I am more excited to TASTE how them... lol
I will post a picture of them for you all to see, good or bad.

So this is officially my 2nd of no work and so far I have made myself be quiet productive.. i have steralized a few dishes that needed to be done since I just got them as gifts and cleaned/organized a couple of cupboards to make room for the new additions. That brings me to another topic....

Kitchens need to have more cupboards. I never seem to have enough room in my kitchen for everything...... Maybe I have too many gadgets.... I use all of them though... Anyone else with this issue? I try not to fall victim to having the newest and greatest of gadget (since there is a gadget for almost any task done in the kitchen) but there are some kitchen gadgets I could not live without.... My Kitchen Aid mixer ( most important ), my food processor, Great set of knives, Crock Pot, Blender, Barbecue tools, Wok, Grill, are to name a few important ones.... Not to mention that these items are not small in size either and take up a fare amount of room.... Okie my rant and pointless babble is over with.

I have a secret

I have a secret, I feel like i can share with everyone now.

Almost 3 months ago my husband and I went through a Miscarriage. It was completely devastating for both of us. We had been trying for awhile to get pregnant, ( 8 months to be exact) and when we found out we were pregnant we were both so excited!! Finally I was going to be a mommy......

I thought I was handeling the miscarriage really well but this last month or so I have realized that its been the opposite. I have tried to bottle the emotions and shove them deep down. They are starting to fill the bottle and overflow into my daily life. I came to realize that if I dont confront them and deal with them that I am just going to keep getting worse not better. So I have decided to leave my current job and start the healing process my body and mind needs so desperately!

Now that I have this out in the open you may find that it becomes another common topic of mine.....

I will give you guys the details as to what happened in another post..... for now I am happy to get that off my chest and share it with all of you!

Thanks for reading my blog..... I could use all the support I can get.